HoopMamma becomes YogaMamma, and Steals the Garage

by HoopMamma on December 12, 2009

How much do I love Hooping when it is cold outside!!??

Well, not much actually. But it’s the only thing that is saving me from the typical 10 to 15 pounds of holiday weight gain. I take that back- it was the yoga combined with the hooping. I really don’t like being cold- which is why I live in Southern California! But lately it’s been cold, even by LA’s standards. I have been having trouble trying to hoop outside; it’s muddy, and I don’t like wearing long sleeves when I hoop. Wah!

However, my local yoga studio is nice and warm, and I love it there. Sometimes there are celebrities in my class, and I like to see them sweat (I know, its sick). Seeing them uneasy, with Yoga pants and old tee shirts makes the world seem a bit more “normal” to me. I have made a commitment to go to a yoga class 3 times a week, and boy has it changed my outlook on life. It even motivated me to quit my yackin’, and clear out a little space in the garage where I can hoop.

Resolutions: this year, I am going to really take ownership of my body. That may sound a bit kooky, but I really mean it. I am going to take my body more seriously than ever. Stay with me:

I have gained a few pounds (literally three), and do not want the trend to continue. So instead of hoping and praying (which is what I usually do), I am focusing some energy inward to ensure my success. There are SO many reasons why I “can’t” be good to myself, and I have used them for so long they have become my standard. Here’s a few, just in case you don’t get my drift:

“I don’t have time”.

“I have other things to do in my spare time”

“I have only gained a couple pounds; no need to freak out”

These ideals are ingrained into my very being when it comes to exercise and diet. I feel like I am waging a war against who I could become, unless I change my ways. They’re all excuses, and that is the bottom line. I deserve to be healthy, and I am committed to making sure that I never become a fat and old lady. Skinny old lady I wouldn’t mind… but fat is out of the question. And genetically, I am predisposed to this condition. Well, I tell you what. As GOD AS MY WITNESS (and obviously, YOU): My children will not inherit my issues. I will be better to myself, and in the process become a better mother.

And so I began to clear a little space in the garage. Then I annexed the entire garage for myself (that was an interesting discussion with hubby, I can tell you). Then I added drywall and track lighting (well, not me personally). And a space heater…Voila! Studio space!

What I created was a space for me and only me. There is a door, and a makeshift desk fashioned out of two sawhorses and a piece of masonite. A small mirror, some paper… and a couple of hoops. I added an iPod dock and speakers for the final touch, and now I have a little sanctuary in the back of the house. I had forgotten what it was like to have a space all my own, which is crazy! My kids have their rooms, my hubby has his studio…the dog even has a crate to call his own! I refuse to accept the kitchen as my “space”. So I stole the garage.

I turned up the music and hooped my bootie off in there. One day, I’ll invest in a bigger mirror, but for now I am happy with what I got. And when Mamma’s happy…. Everybody’s happy.

Be Good to Yourself!

HoopMamma

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HoopMamma meets Hoopalicious

by HoopMamma on November 4, 2009

I am so excited for tonight- I have a 90 minute session with Annah- AKA Hoopalicious (www.hooprevolution.com) after work!
Why I am thrilled about this: First, Annah is whom I credit for being the most influential Hooper of all time. She has taught everyone, both directly and indirectly, so much about this art. When I first started with Hoopnotica, hoopdance was really obscure. While it had already gained some ground in local underground communities, there were not too many people teaching. If you took the people who were really involved in the movement at the time (Hoopnotica; Hoop Gir; Spiral; Diana Lopez), and traced back their histories, you would eventually get to Annah. She is the “Mother of all Hoopers”.
So getting the opportunity to work with her privately is really an honor. I am a bit scared- I have challenged her to really dig in and make a better performer outta me. I am looking forward to seeing what she has to dish, and expect it to be really great. I also expect to have my little HoopMamma a$$ kicked. I promise to share what I learn!!
Getting to a place in my practice where I feel bored is something that is challenging for me. I love to hoop, and love to be challenged, but Hoopdance still does not have the support it needs to be easily accessed by us all. Instead, we must find the energy to inspire each other- locally, and on the web- to excel as hoopers. Your assignment for the day- should you so choose- is to find a You Tube video that inspires you, and learn one move from it. One NEW move; or an oldie but goodie that you had forgotten about. Watch for style, and how adding personal style to ANY move can breathe new life into your practice. And stay tuned for my updates after my lesson. I am filled with excitement!

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Mucho Muscle Appreciation

October 27, 2009

This morning I found a new muscle growing in my leg. I was on my tippie toes in the mirror (the only way to look at myself in the mirror), and I noticed that the little area between where my thigh and hip connect has changed. There are now two indentations where there used to be flab… wow!
I think this has happened because I have been incorporating a lot of “dips” into my hooping. I call them dips; you might know them as “plies” or “squats”. I am calling them dips, because… well, because thats what I call them.
Putting the dance into hoopdance is a function of personal style- paying attention to your hands and feet is the first step in defining/refining that style, and how you move your body when you are not technically IN the hoop is the second step to a stunning performance. Turns out, it also invites new muscles!
Dipping is easy to do, and fun play with. Just watch your form, bend at the knees, and drop slowly into your hips (dont bend at the waist). You can drop all the way to the floor (for all you pole enthusiasts), or keep them shallow, alternating legs.
Try it out- at Hoopnotica, we call this “playing with levels”. Experiment with the level your hoop is spinning at, and play with how your body relates to that level by moving up and down. Its beautiful, and will give your body a new challenge.

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New Love, Old Flame

October 25, 2009

I am becoming such a freak (becoming?). This morning I dragged my HUGE indian mirror into my kitchen, made a pot of coffee, and danced in my underwear all morning. I have become obsessed with the little double hoop action (I wrote about it with links to examples of people who do this really well a few blogs ago). I cannot believe how obsessed I am with them!

This is the kind of exercise I like, Man…. overall, I had been going through a phase of Anti-Hoopmamma…. not allowing myself time to hoop, or really the desire to do so. I kinda figured that I don’t really need it anymore now that I am “tiny”; and I know most of the moves so who cares…. I lost a connection with my love of hooping.

I am choosing to forgive myself and move on because A) NO one cares, B) Every love needs space to breathe, and C) It doesn’t matter now, we’ve re-kindled our relationship. Or maybe I have started a new one?

ISOLATIONS

I started playing with the “doubles” (in my kitchen, in my underwear) on Monday night after the day was done. Then it became every morning first thing (for like 5 minutes before the little banshees er-angels- came screaming out of their rooms). Then I started bringing them with me to pick up Illiana from school- I walk a few blocks… I have been bringing ONE with me, and practicing my left arm (way weaker than the right, it turns out). I have been having so much fun with them- they are easy to carry around, because they are small (and they look like an amazing accessory- I am the coolest mom, I know it).

By Friday, Raileen in the office had made me 4 or 5 sets: “I need them smaller”; “I need them bigger”; “I need them lighter”; and (my personal favorite) “I need them to glow in the dark”. To all of these, Raileen my office GODDESS :                hoopnotica-she-works-hard2 replied, “Yup- no problem.”. In case ya’ll were not aware… my staff ROCKS.

By the end of the week (today), I can report that I feel stronger and more grounded through my daily practice with the hoops. My arms are RIPPED, and I am totally having a great time. I remember that this is the way hoopdancing was for me when I first began learning, and that I had just plateaued out for a minute. That is the way hooping has existed for me for years. It constantly reinvents itself.

I got the most epic orange hoop from the office yesterday. It turns out we made a few (like 4- don’t get your hopes up)  from some old tape hoopnoticahighperfweb_04(really expensive stuff) that is painfully beautiful. I don’t think a photo will do it justice. It tricks your eyes as you use it..it is so many colors… reminds me of rainbow sherbet. Yes, it is a full size hoop… which is wierd because I cannot say enough about the small ones right now. My new love of the tiny double hoops has led me to find new and beautiful ways of expressing myself in the big hoop (all connected). It is better than it ever has been before. It’s like I got together with my ex boyfriend!

But what about the twins? Will they be jealous? (NO- they are inanimate objects- DUH)

HoopMamma says this: Who says you can’t love (and own) more than one hoop? There’s usually more than enough love to go around, and I got lots to give. I don’t have t be one kind of “hooper”; HoopMamma can change and evolve… and find loves of lots of different kinds of movement. And hoops- big ones, little ones… toy ones, fitness ones… are omni-important to everything, always. If I am not hooping, there is typically a reason. I need to create less of those reasons.

Tomorrow, I think I am going to hoop with one hoop (I LOVE YOU, ORANGE MYSTERY HOOP!!)… just for old times sake : )

Happy Hooping, Mammas…

HoopMamma

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Ex-Fatty visits the Great Dr. OZ!

October 23, 2009

Wow… what a crazy few days it has been. Between the First Lady hooping on national TV and my debut on Dr.Oz, the Hoopnotica office has been all a BUZZ with activity! Orders coming in, and messangers out to sets all over the world who want Hoopnotica hoops for their morning talk shows, etc. Fun, fun, fun. The segment for Dr. Oz, if you haven’t seen it yet  is here:

HoopMamma on Dr. Oz

What you didn’t see, was the HUGE before picture that they threw up on the screen behind me. Looks like our segment got cut from 3 minutes to two minutes (down from 6). It was a really high energy segment, and the ladies who came to support were fantastic.

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The experience was not without its hiccups. First, we didn’t have a green room (duh- don’t they know who I AM??!!). And so we all lined up in the hallway, directly accross the hall from the Jimmy Fallon Show. What that means, is that there was NOWHERE to warm up and practice, except in front of the elevators and the other green rooms. So we did (no fruit plate… no gift bag schwag). This was really cool, because we got to hang out with the likes of LENNY KRAVITZ and his band (ummm… HOT); and (perhaps more importantly for this little HoopMamma), the ROOTS (Jimmy’s house band- I can call him Jimmy now, because that is how WE DO in show business- smirk!). The Roots are like the sickest band ever, and I hoop to them all the time. It was an honor to listen to them practice, and hoop right outside the door. Whenever they were hanging out in the halls, you can bet I was hooping my butt off. Nevermind that I had my make-up all set, and I was sweating like a… well… there is nothing beautiful I can compare sweat to. Lets just leave it that I was looking all “dewey”).

So the girls and I practiced our “routine” in front of the elevators (the fire marshall was especially pleased).

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Until it was time to go on the show, we practiced and tried not to piss anyone off  who needed to get on or off an elevator. I sweet talked the fire marshall, and flirted with security. You can always count on HoopMamma to keep the party rollin’. I didn’t have time to meet Dr.Oz before, but I thought his entire staff was absolutely lovely. (Special shout out to JUDY and Diane- you ladies keep that show running and that man looking GREAT!!!)

When it was finally time to film, we were all ready to go. I was so psyched: I am in the best physical shape of my life (I have actually toned up even more just since we taped two weeks ago), and I was pumped to show off. It was super difficult to cram everything in: They wanted me to teach Dr. Oz to hoop (3 moves, and then choreograph a routine), tell my weight loss story, demo my master skills (ah, ninja HoopMamma), and take Dr.Oz through the routine with my New York (and DC!) ladies. We all knew that was NOT gonna fit into a 3 minute segment (remember, they got us out there by promising a 6 minute segment. Ehhhhem- like we wouldn’t have gone for a 3? Yeah, right.). We did the best we could, and it looks like it was cut to a 2 minute segment in the end. So what did you miss?

THE FAT PICTURE.

At a certain point, they asked me to showcase my skillz, and I began to rock out, when I heard the entire audience omit an awful gasp! I turned around, and the screen was filled with a 20×20 image of me at my fattest:

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It was awesome! I felt like I was on top of the world, really. Here I was- tiny little me, with who I USED to be up behind me, larger than life. It was like a brief moment that I got to pay tribute to the body that trapped me for so many years. Does that sound cheezy? I am a fraction of who I used to be, and feel more myself than I had ever dreamed possible. I was SO BUMMED when the footage got cut. But hey- that’s Hollywood. Er- Rockafeller Center…!

If you tuned in, or TiVo’d- thanks for the support. This is a really great plug for hoopers and hooping instructors/entrepreneurs everywhere! I know Dr. Oz “credited” me with “…bringing back the Hula Hoop”; but I NEVER implied this. Just for the record. I was (and still am) grateful for the opportunity to have been on the show.

Happy Hooping, friends (and Dr.s!)!

HoopMamma

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Just Do It.

October 21, 2009

I always get what I want. If it doesn’t exist,I invent it; If I don’t understand it, I research it; If no one has it, I build it. I am laser focussed when I want something. I wanted desperately to lose weight for many years, and spent most of my adult life overweight.

I became a self proclaimed “Lifetime Fatty”. I hated running. I hated Weight Watchers. Jenni. The Zone. They were all the same, and they all sucked. Dieting sucked (and me neither following the diet nor refusing to exercise had nothing to do with it, damnit!)

When I started this company, I did it because I was inspired. After just a experiences with few hoopdance, I began to notice a change in my body (this was shocking). I was surprised that something so much fun could be so effective (especially for me- you know, obviously physically unable to lose weight); and in my first summer hooping, I lost 20 pounds (what’s the catch?). Today, I have lost a total of 57 pounds (don’t believe me, scroll down), and I am a new person because of it. I’m not the only one with this story, either. Check out Shavonne; her weight loss story is so fun, and she’s a regular blogger for Hoopnotica. You can read more about her here:

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shavonne-after

There is no reason why we cannot have everything in life that we desire (and usually with slightly less drama than what we create). Most answers are easy to come by- including how to lose weight. We just have to be prepared to follow the rules, and NOT CHEAT. Thats all it comes down to. I designed to Hoop It Off Package to support you with your weight loss goals, and it is a great way to get your exercise in. Remember, Hooping burns up to 600 calories an hour!

HoopMamma works hard. At the end of my day (or the beginning of my day) there is very little time (if ever) for me to be alone. Most of the time I am so busy taking care of everything and every one around me, that I forget to brush my teeth until halfway through the day (New rule: No coffee until you brush, Mamma!), and I look like I am 12 because I have no make-up on (slight exaggeration… only a little dramatic). I choose to spend these moments hooping.

Hooping doesn’t require much; a few minutes a day. I say that knowing full well that if you get the DVD, and watch just a few minutes of it, hooping will keep you inspired to practice every day. Its fun; easy to learn; and best of all effective. You’ll want to do more than just a few minutes, and it will surprise you how good you’ll feel.

Our bodies are our temples. When we allow ourselves to slack on our responsibilities to ourselves, everything suffers. When our minds and bodies are strong, we can think more clearly, and it is reflected in everything that we do.

We owe it to ourselves and those around us to stay healthy and FIT.

HoopMamma, fatty. Go Fatty, Go.

fatty

I more or less started out fat. Okay, “chubby”. 10 pounds overweight was always “thin” by this Italian girl’s standards, and I managed to suppress how much it bothered me. I said things like, “I like curves on a woman”, or  that I was “vouluptuous”. I grew fatter and fatter every year. Blame it on whatever- the “freshman 15”; hormonal deficiencies (I personally enjoyed the ‘thyroid’ excuse); marriage; the job that “forced me to sit on my a$$ all day long”; pregnancy; and breast-feeding (kids are the best scape goats EVER on this one, right? Who can fight you on this one and not look like a jerk?).

I had lots of stories to tell myself. At one point I was sold on the excuse that “I just gain a little more during winter months”. I had heard a young actress on tv coin that one during an interview, and thought it to be brilliant! I bet she did in fact gain like 2-5 pounds more (therefore disqualifying her from the swim suit edition) during the cold season (is there really a cold season in LA?). Now you know all that chick had to do was skip lunch and add three jumping jacks to her regime and she would be “slim again for summer”. And there is no doubt in my mind- she would.

I loved this excuse, and always matched those two pounds (and raised them by 5 or 10), seriously stocking up for the (LA) winter. I would say my average was about 7 pounds a year. My problem was, I never actually lost my “winter coat”, and just allowed it to “hang out” over the summer. Summer turned to Fall.. Fall to Winter… you see where I am going with this, right?

Yes, the Winter Storage theory is one of the more brilliant excuses I have ever manifested; lovely and poetic. It was killing me. I had become obese through no fault other than my own hands, and was cleverly inventing ways to avoid it.

It wasn’t until I was in India last year that I realized just how fat I had become. See, I have always “carried myself well”: proportionate; fatty tissue distributed over key parts of the body. I had big boobs (everybody loves big boobs, right?), nice round bootie (thank you, hip hop for making this okay)…. skinny ankles (make everything else look smaller, right?!) I was… lets say curvy… buxom?

Well, maybe not. Buxom sounds fatter than I ever was (enter my delusion). I mean LOOK at this picture- I was fatter than BUXOM. Now, I am TINY.

after-1Keaton and I (pink pants) in Toronto for a morning news program

after-3 This is me while practicing with the Hoopnotica New York crew… right before our special NBC airing of the DR OZ show (watch for updates on Thursday!!)

Grab yourself a hoop, and lets go have some fun.

HoopMamma

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Dr.Oz Show

October 21, 2009

Hey friends! We will be featured in a segment on Dr. Oz today! Tune in and check it out (I totally may have made a fool of myself on national TV). You can click below for the link, or check the Hoopnotica website for great deals  on our travelhoops and video stream….!

Read more about Hoopnotica hooping on the Dr Oz show.

Happy Hooping!

HoopMamma

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Fun with Fatties

July 12, 2009

After feeling pretty good about my pin up photo shoot, I have pretty much stopped focusing heavily on weight loss. This is not to say that I have achieved my goal weight (I couldn’t be more than 10 or 12 lbs away). I just sorta decided to stop focusing on it.  I haven’t gained, I haven’t lost…. but the other day I was trying on a shirt in one of those God-awful stores with the three mirrors… you know the ones? Designed so that you may check out your a$$, or in my case the rolls of fat that still haunt my figure from the rear? I was horrified.

I complained to Melissa that I had all this back fat. She reminded me that I have lost over 40 pounds, and that there is not much left. “In fact,” she explained, “People probably look at you and don’t think that you’re fat anymore.” Although I could fundamentally agree with her, I sorta feel like until I get to my goal weight, I am still fat. Its a little sick, right? Will it ever be good enough for me? I will let you know, I promise.

For now, there is a place in my head and heart that thinks I have not lost any weight, and that I have made it all up in my mind. For this thought, Melissa gave me an exercise we lovingly dubbed “Fun with Fat”:

We took the 20 Pounds of Butter I had in the fridge, and Melissa added 10 more pounds (the people at Albertson’s think were nuts). She stuffed these thirty pounds of butter into a backpack, and we “took our fat for a walk”:

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It was awesome! Thirty pounds (and I have totally lost more than that) is heavier than I had ever realized. We took turns walking our fat around the neighborhood (she promised to buy me a diet coke- what can I say- it doesn’t take much to make me happy). After a few blocks, my body really began to complain, and I couldn’t believe that I used to be so heavy. Every step was a work-out… the thought of how this weight really affected my joints… even when we over shot the market by a block and a half… I didn’t want to walk it. I was grumpy, I was angry… and I am so glad she made me do it.

We walked with the butter a total of 4 blocks, trading off as we went. We laughed… we cried… Melissa fell over and was almost injured. We eventually had to leave the backpack and come back for it with the car (falling somewhere between pathetic and ridiculous). Everyone should have the experience of feeling how much extra weight they have either shed or have yet to lose. Its a nasty reality.

I used to make up excuses why I didn’t need to lose weight, and how happy I was- how I didn’t “need” to do anything. I was quick to be resigned to failure. I am so much happier and healthier as a result of this weight loss. Thank GOD. I am going to keep the butter in a backpack for the next week, and carry it with me whenever I feel like I am “unaccomplished”. Or perhaps I will just limit it to 12 pounds (what I have left to lose), and remove the butter/weight as I lose it? Seems like carrying around the extra 40+ might be a little excessive. But then again…HoopMamma is a little excessive : )

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HoopMamma Has Arrived

June 30, 2009

A really long, long time ago… I set out to lose 30 pounds by Christmas. I fell short, but continued through the new year with my mission to be healthier and happier by shedding the excess weight I had slowly gained over the years. I blamed everything from my thyroid to my children, and you have heard it all over the past year. There have been ups and downs, and I have learned so much about myself (and about you) in the process. I want to thank you for all of your love and support through it all, and hope that you have enjoyed the time as much as I have.

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HoopMamma has learned many things that never would she ever have seen coming when she started this epic saga of a weight loss mission, and I have to say that most of it has not been fair or pretty… until now. First of all, when I started, I figured I was about 30 pounds overweight. I now sit before you with (smaller) love handles; 4 pounds lighter than I used to be. I am still going for another 10 pounds, friends…. but I might occasionally pretend it is only 5. Some days, I tell people I am at my goal…. sigh. It turns out, I am much smaller than I would have ever guessed- and thinking that I was 50 or 60 pounds overweight would have just been too much for me to think about a year ago. I was delusional, and I found hope in my delusion. Sometimes our minds keep us sane by re-creating the truth… its so nice. The bottom line is this: I weighed 174 pounds when I started this blog. I had been kicked off my own Hooping team by our Japanese distributor for being fat, and I could barely sit and breathe at the same time. Running was out of the question.

I now weigh 128, and I am a whole new person. People treat me differently (its kinda sick, and I try not to let it get to me too much), and I consider myself and my needs in a whole new light. But I am still overweight.

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I have decided that, come hell or high water… AS GOD AS MY WITNESS… these last pounds are gonna fall off. I don’t care how many cocktails I have to pass on (I am a FREAK for diet coke with lime); how many pieces of sushi I have to remove from their cute little rice paddies; or how many trips up and down the stairs I have to make… I want to be at my goal weight, damnit. Evidently, that goal is closer to 115 than 135. And with my luck, I’ll get to 115, and I’ll still be 10 pounds away. What I have learned is that (God really laughs whenever I plan anything) time is irrelevant in our goals to lose weight and to be healthy- every week is a new decision to move forward and not backward. Every day there are choices that can be made to bring us closer to our goals… and one day, we’ll just arrive.

For me, “arriving” is what it feels like. Like hooping: One day, after banging my shins over and over…. the hoop clicks into place and my body is doing exactly what it needs to do to keep the hoop rotating around my knees. I practiced that move for ages…. incorrectly… bruised and PISSED… until one day, I arrived.

I was in the dressing room buying jeans at Lucky Brand the other day, and I asked for a size 8. I held my breath in anticipation of the squeezing (and pulling and heaving) I was gonna need to do…. but they just slid on. Too easy. I asked the lady for a 6. And then a 4. And finally a 2. And then I pulled ‘em up (just a minor bit of struggle)- and there I stood….. a friggin’ size 2.

Since then I have realized that a 2 is also a 4 and sometimes a large and sometimes an extra small. These fashion people have got to get their sh!% together, man… But regardless… I have arrived. And as the fearless leader of our company, it was my great pleasure to nominate myself for the role of Pin Up Model this month. Check out the new Summer Pin Up Collection, and enjoy a few previews right here. Thank You for your love… thank you for your support… and here is to 10 more pounds, HoopMamma style!

seated lying leg-up rose-sm

Don’t ever give up. Don’t ever give up. Don’t ever give up.

HoopMamma

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HoopMamma in New Orleans

June 30, 2009
Our lives are never entirely of our own making. Detours of destiny are all around…
And so my journey into New Orleans began. Freshly rested from a nice bout with the stomach flu, I found myself on a plane with Melissa headed to what could only be described as a well-deserved “Spring Break”. My tummy was a little weak, and the thought of drinking alcohol was not at all appealing. My whole intention for the trip was to fully unwind; get away from my family/business a bit; and hoop my a$$ off.
HoopMamma in NOLA
Hooping in another city is great; there is no anxiety about anyone recognizing me, and I really felt like I could cut loose. And that we did- From the moment we arrived at our hotel, we were off and running through different bars, streets, and venues. It has been non-stop hooping, drinking and eating for the past week. And you know what? I have never felt better in my life!
I am just 8 pounds away from my goal, and Hoopnotica is getting ready to be featured on another national media outlet. This time, I am going to go and represent the brand. I am ready- I am confidant, and I am just a little chubby. For those of you reading my blog for the first time, “chubby” is a very big deal for me. I have spent a lifetime being fat.
Being fat means that no one is really gonna tell you like it is, right? Its not like anyone wants to be the responsible party for making the fat girl cry. Besides, I think some people have enjoyed holding their true feelings in- maybe it made them feel superior in a way. Like no matter what- atleast they’re not fat like “that girl”. I can totally get it. People are coming out of the woodwork to treat me differently, now that I only have one chin. And not just skinny folks- fat ones, too. Huh! Didn’t see that one coming:
I went and saw Michael Franti play twice in New Orleans- once on a River Boat called “the Queen”, and once at what seemed to be a renovated barn called       All the locals called it “Tip’s”.
Whenever there was room, I put my Travel Hoop together and danced alongside the band. I couldn’t of been happier- a hooping fool, I tell you. It was nice to really test out the new Travel Hoop- let it hit the wall, the ground…. drunk men. Took a beating, and looked great, I tell you. Even soaked in beer.
There were a few moments that really had a profound impact upon me. Because, Mammas… I have an announcement to make: I am no longer FAT (maybe just pudgy). Chubby. Chunky. Whatever. But not fat; and this is totally a new for me. There are so many things I have become accustomed to, and generally just accepted for so long about being overweight. Now that these things are no longer true, its like a whole new world, really. Skinny people probably cannot relate, or if they used to be fat may have forgotten. Am I making any sense right now? EXAMPLE:
One guy at the show offered to lift me onto his shoulders (I think he may have been diggin’ me more than I him; but I have been married for 9 years, and don’t mind the flattery, right?)! I said, “You couldn’t lift me up there- there’s no way!” To this he replied with stars in his eyes, “You are a tiny little thing, girl- I could keep you on my shoulders all night long”. I was shocked- somewhere between the stomach flu and now, I had dropped into the “not fat” category, and this man was calling me “tiny”. Holy cow. He meant it- he had every intention of lifting me up! The ceiling was a little low, and so I stopped him before my tiny (slightly intoxicated) a$$ wound up in a neck brace. For the best…
But it didn’t stop there (Hooray!)! Later, I had made my way towards the middle of the floor, and was boxed in by people all much taller than I. Not all that unusual, ’cause HoopMamma measures in at just under 5’. Usually, I like to rock a platform shoe, or other fabulous high shoe- but not tonight. The Louisianna summer is hot and muggy, and I came to dance, dance, dance… so this particular evening called for flip flops. Shorter than usual; without a care in the world; and loving the music that the Franti Trio was jammin… I was in my own world. Until the lady next to me yelled “down” at me ,”You are SO CUTE!! I didn’t even see you there- you’re so tiny!”
There was that word again; tiny. The first time could have been a fluke- but twice in one evening? Good Lord- when had I become tiny? I was so excited, that I leaned over and shouted in her ear, “Thank You! I have lost a lot of weight- and no one has really called me tiny before!”
She looked shocked. “No way! Even if you were heavier, you would still be tiny to me! You are just a baby- you couldn’t be more than 17!!”
I then realized that the short jean skirt and tank top outfit that Melissa had needed to beg me to purchase was now worth its weight in gold. This woman really thought I was a kid. I had to confess (HoopMamma doesn’t always know when to keep her mouth shut), so I shouted, “I am 32 and have two kids- really, I am just short! But if you would have seen me 30 pounds ago, the word ‘tiny’ would have never entered your mind!” She continued to resist. It dawned on me that there are certain people who will never tell you the truth about your weight, for fear that they would be seen as “mean” or “rude”. I said Thank You and smiled… clasped my hands over my heart, and hugged her.
Just then, two giant men in front of us got wind of my weight loss story and “tiny” issues, and turned around to look at me up and down (bizarre that they were able to hear me, as it was SO loud in there). One of them belted at me, “No way, man! You’re freakin’ TINY!!” And the other guy grabbed my hand and started yelling ,”Let her through! She’s too tiny to be back here!! Let her see the show- she’s so tiny!” Using their girth and powerful vocals, the audience parted like the sea for Moses, and I was cajoled through people chiming in agreement,“You’re so tiny!” …and I shouted out loud to the heavens “I am so tiny!!” Until I got to the front, and a big fattie woman saw me coming and didn’t move. She was the only person who stood between me and the stage. Huh- the irony.
“Can I stand in front of you? I am so tiny you won’t even notice that I am there!” I smiled at her and winked- totally into my new “tiny” role at this point. She winced, looked me up and down, rolled her eyes and said “NO.” She looked totally annoyed with my cuteness. “I am sorry, but NO”.
Buzz kill! It was then that I realized that I was no longer fat. When other fatties didn’t recognize me as being “one of them”, my weight loss journey was slowing to a close.
The next day, I went shopping! I did this as a sort of test- see what size I really was. I have spent days in dressing rooms trying to squeeze my bootie into  size 14’s; sure that my body is slimmer than it used to be. Dressing rooms are downright foreboding to me as a result of these memories, and even though a 10 has been tight on me for the past 2 months, secretly I was afraid I was imagining my transformation. Could it really be true? Could trying on clothes no longer be like stuffing a sausage into its casing?
I have determined that I am now a size 8- sometimes a 6. I can’t get over it! I had thought the jeans skirt thing was a fluke- but now I am convinced. With 8 more pounds to lose, I am no longer FAT. In fact, I am tiny. And in 8 pounds, I will be tiny-er.
I am grateful for Hoopnotica getting me here. With this new publicity spot, I am thrilled to  be a representation for my company; and I am blessed to have found something that keeps me moving, time and time again… because I love it. Thank you for sharing this journey with me.
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